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My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard.  Mother would come out and say, "You're tearing up the grass."  "We're not raising grass," Dad would reply.  "We're raising boys."  ~Harmon Killebrew



When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around.  But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years.  ~Author unknown, commonly attributed to Mark Twain but no evidence has yet been found for this (Thanks, Garson O'Toole!)



First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly.  ~Branch Rickey




Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once.  ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990




Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once.  ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990



In childhood, we yearn to be grown-ups.  In old age, we yearn to be kids.  It just seems that all would be wonderful if we didn't have to celebrate our birthdays in chronological order.  ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com




Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life.  ~Herbert Asquith



Father! - to God himself we cannot give a holier name.  ~William Wordsworth

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I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich.  ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter

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Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.  ~Chili Davis
A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun.  Enjoy the trip.  ~Author Unknown
One father is more than a hundred Schoolemasters.  ~George Herbert, Outlandish Proverbs, 1640

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The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.  ~Lucille Ball